Wednesday, August 3, 2011

My first official day off

I accomplished a lot today.
I didn't watch a shit-load of TV
I was really social.
I ate a really healthy meal.
I taught the pup some new tricks.
I enjoyed the sun.
I cleaned up the house (a bit).
I could get used to this....

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

The Pup

Bodhi saying: "HEY YOU GUYS!!!"
(second from right)

Husband & I fell in love with a puppy. It's hard not to, when you stare into those cute puppy eyes and watch them as they trip over their giant puppy feet. The puppy kisses and nibbles tug at your heartstrings, begging "pleasetakemehomenow-causeIwillloveyouforever"

Bodhi melted my heart with her soft puppy ears and muzzle. Her wriggly, little body could not have been more excited to be out and about in the world outside of her pen. Until it was time to leave the only home she had known thus far.

Please don't leave me.... I am too cute to be left here.

She had never been around any other people, aside from her parents' handlers. She had never met any other dog, aside from her litter mates and parents. Social anxiety was kicking in before we even got her in the car for the (super long) drive home. For her first time in a vehicle, Bodhi did surprisingly well. The next test would be sleeping through the night, or at least part of it, without any indoor accidents. Success. 

Over the next few days, Bodhi learned that inside of the house was for eating and sleeping, and outside was for elimination. Playtime was still undefined. Her puppy instincts hadn't kicked in yet. She was scared of exploring, toys, noises, people, cars, and just being a dog.  Over the last three weeks, Husband & I have really brought her out of her shell by exposing her to as much stimuli as possible. We've taken her on so many car rides, visiting friends, going to the dog beach, driving up to the mountains, meeting as many other dogs as possible, while also making each experience as positive as possible. Bodhi still has a long way to go in the whole socialization aspect of life (she is just over 3 months old), but I think Husband & I are on the right track. 
Sleepy puppy = happy puppy.
Bodhi has been an amazing addition to our family, in such a unique way. I can truly feel a trust and bond developing between her and I, which I didn't expect so soon. Her loyalty towards me is already so strong. It's surreal for me to feel that so quickly, especially since I want to reciprocate the respect. 
Me. 
The one who shuts out everyone. 

Monday, August 1, 2011

The Month I Wasn't Expecting

July 2011 was a bit of a downer.
I lost my job.
My favorite cat ran away from home.
My husband's new-to-him truck stopped working.
And I have been feeling pretty sick lately.

I am sure a combo of the above has to do with my not feeling well. To top it off, in my own fucked up mind, every summer for the last 4(?) years my head convinces me that I am pregnant - even though I am not. Every little emotional nuance and odd cramp and slight bulge and nauseating episode and heightened sense of taste and smell and migraine and backache sends me to google to research pregnancy and other 'what-is-its'. Mostly pregnancy.
Pretty much always pregnancy.
I am not sure how I really feel about that.
I don't know if it's

  • an emotional hormone-y side effect of my meds. 
  • or because I am getting older. 
  • or because my friends are having having babies.
  • or of a need to feel like I am 'trying' to accomplish something by 'pretending' I want to get pregnant, so people get off my back about not wanting to have kids. Today, anyway. 

Babies = so cute. I don't deny that. All of my friends' kids are adorable and sweet and I treasure them forever. And I will probably want my own in a year or two. (Cause they are such a great accessory, amIright?)
I am not ready yet. <Insert excuse here, here & here.>
So why do I feel a tiny, tinge of disappointment every time I get my period?