I quit for a various reasons. Too many messy reactions - physically, mentally, emotionally - have pushed me away forever, save for the odd glass of Pinot Gris at holiday gatherings with family. I do miss it, but I don't at the same time.
One thing that sucks is that I have forgotten how to be the outgoing self that came out when I drank. When I am sober I tend to be shy in group settings. Generally a little paranoid because I usually don't know how to keep the conversation going. That entertaining, inhibited, confident self that comes out around two or three drinks (before turning into the loud, 'i think i can dance' girl who knows the words to every song and gives every guy in the room the 'fuck me' eyes) is in me somewhere but struggles to come out.
I am awkward.
I am inappropriate.
I make dumb jokes.
I act like a sixth grader at their first co-ed party.
Purely & socially inept.
Husband is a huge social butterfly. Whether he is drinking or not, he can carry on a conversation like no body's business. However, lately his reactions to conversations I try to hold with him are becoming more bamboozling, and the drinking does not help. It's not a problem, the drinking. It's just 'the thing to do'. I don't say that to defend him. I say that because it's true. It's a social thing, and there is nothing wrong with that.
However I need to work on my social skills. I need to re-learn how to properly interact with people without the aid of booze. I need some go-to statements that are a guarantee no-fail topic, that won't end up with me having my foot in my mouth.
What are your tricks? How do you succeed at being social? How do you develop and maintain that confidence without the assistance of a little drinky-drink?
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